kristin has been a bad kristin
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
