That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Randomize
