So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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