you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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