Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
