Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
