real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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