I'm really into asian looking animals
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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