I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
