Your face is a jimmy john
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
