You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize