I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
