when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
