He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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