I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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