Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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