nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
