You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
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