if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
