I wanna bring you to show and tell
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
