How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
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