small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
