You're so nebulous sometimes
You're completely useless in the revolution.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Randomize
