hell yes lets make some ravioli
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
