STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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