I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
