She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
