A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
