You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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