I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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