Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Randomize