You can't special order awesome
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
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