I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
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