Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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