i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
