So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
