I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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