I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
he quoted the bible to break up with me
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
