he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I had to cum in my sink.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
