it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
fuck your aforementioned shoe
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Randomize
