R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
