Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize