Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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