Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
