Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
