Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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