Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
