It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
