One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize