i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
