Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
