I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize